Ram Tomaneng, if you’re seeing this…haha!

Sobrang bilis ng oras, Huwebes na muli.

Today is the peak of my hell week. I had two exams: MBB 130 and Philo1. The day before we had our annual MBB Idol singing contest in preparation for the CS Idol. So yeah, I didn’t have too much time to study for both exams but luckily I pulled through. I actually studied a little bit of 130 two days before which I think helped me somehow. Woot! Cramming is never the key but it’s super hard to get away from it. It’s an addiction. Haha! I myself can’t not cram and I think it will forever be in me but I’m trying my best not to do it over the edge. No matter what anyone say, preparing for stuff is always the best way. Kahit na sabihin ng mga tao na kung mas effective ka pag nagccram ka, I don’t believe that. That’s just an excuse. Failing to plan is planning to fail. I once read on the newspaper about this valedictorian from HS who went on to study in Harvard (forgot who he was) whose ‘motto’ in life was: “What I lack in talent, I make up by hard work.” And I’ve always remembered it ever since.

Just to clarify, I believe I don’t have talent (or mad skills). Growing up, I haven’t really found my niche in this world. But I won’t give up! even when I’m in my 30s and I still haven’t found my passion, I WILL NOT GIVE UP! I always get jealous of others because they seem to be good at everything…especially in academics which is something I love but seem to have always taken for granted(slightly sad to say). I think I’m so eager to grow up and have a job when in fact it’s not easy at all. Gahhh, I know I’m so stupid for only realizing this now but better late than never, right? Anywaaaaaay, what I want to say is that even if I’m not great at what I do, I know that I can still be great through practice and hard work. If only I’m not lazy… Seriously, that’s my problem! I know the importance of stuff but they never get to me. It’s like I understand but I don’t appreciate things. I keep waiting for an epiphany but somehow all the realizations I have don’t satisfy me. What is wrong with me? Is this normal? Or am I just KSP or apathetic and stuff?

I have lots of dreams. Hopefully, I’ll be able to pull through and work hard for them. No more easy track and side-dreaming. Maybe I’m just getting paranoid because the list of interview qualifiers for PGH was released. There are only a few people who got through and I am praying to GOD that I can have enough to pass! This has been bugging me for days and I could not sleep even if my chance in the spotlight is still a year from now. I keep telling myself to JUST DO THINGS and study hard! No more outward excuses. It is time to focus.

Speaking of dreams, I’ve lately been thinking of the other path which I can take after graduation and that is the wonderful world of RESEARCH! Actually, I really want to learn more about the different laboratories and projects that I can do and I always dream of submitting a paper in Nature and getting a Nobel Prize someday (who doesn’t want that, duh). I guess I’m taking the graduate course exams too just to see if I can get into a decent school abroad. Anyway, I wanna tell more about this dream of mine in another entry because it deserves to have an own entry hahaha seeing as I might not be able to achieve it. Hello, asa sa Nobel pero malay mo?! Libre mangarap. I’ve just been inspired to study my ass off because of that pesteng Nobel Prize Certificate our Prof showed us. Here it is and it looks so damn cute!

THE John Fenn’s Nobel Prize certificate for his work on Electron Spray Ionization (google images)


This is legit (accdg to my prof). It’s so pretty!


2 thoughts on “Subluminal

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